Hello my dear Mofo readers! I took a bit of a hiatus with blogging (AGAIN) but I'm back! (At least for this month!)



Let's get some biz out of the way:

First thank you for all of the nice things you commented about my blog post about my beloved Kashif--I know it was all over the place but I'm glad you got the gist of it and just know that I appreciate those heartfelt condolences as I am still trying to grasp and come to terms with his death.

Second, I issued a blog challenge on social media and this time I got more specific-- the first blog for this month has to be about gratitude. The second blog is a funny story, and the third is a free for all- write whatever is in your heart. These blogs go on YOUR personal blogs, facebook, websites, wherever you post your ish..if you want.. I'm always open to guest bloggers.. just hit me up!

Now that is out of the way--- sometimes life just hands you a bunch of lemons and an invisible hand squishes them bitches in your eyeballs.

What does this have to do with gratitude?

I'm glad you asked...absolutely nothing really..I just needed a transition here. Bear with me.

So two weeks ago I found myself still reeling from learning of Kashif's passing, and making the decision not to go across the country for his memorial, but instead I watched it from the courtesy of my own home where I could ugly cry to my hearts content..fling myself in the floor and wonder WHYYYYYY didn't I pick up the damn phone when I thought of him the day before he died? I found myself wondering what can I do to honor an amazing man that probably thought I didn't listen to half of the lessons he taught me.. a man that lived his life without fear, a man with a ginormous musical legacy--what could lil ole me do to remember him and make myself feel better?
So I started going through old emails, text messages--his social media posts..looking for a word.. a hidden message..something to guide me.

WELP--that led me down to the tattoo spot down the street. How is this gratitude Meik? Hang on I'm getting there!

I was torn --do I get a tattoo with my Virgo sign? Do I get his name tatted across my chest with hearts? (Just kidding on that one!) Or do I go by one of the principles that he always believed in--and the more I thought about it--the word GRATITUDE just kept jumping out at me...every single email...I replayed conversations in my mind, the theme was the same.. GRATITUDE--

I walked into the tattoo spot.. guy asked me what I wanted to get...

Me: I want ALWAYS IN GRATITUDE on my arm.

He blank stared and said uhhh ok--that's cool. Give me 15 minutes..

I kept thinking should I do this? What does it really even mean? I have time to walk back outta here and forget I ever walked in here.. but I couldn't move. See, Kashif always signed his emails --Always in Gratitude-- and while I never really asked him about it I always noticed it-- he would sign off on his social media the same way.

So I decided this is it.. Kashif would want me to remember to always be in gratitude-- be grateful for the things you have. He always stayed in my arse when I was having a pity party by reminding me of all the things I had to be grateful for.

Oh hell tattoo dude is back. *deep breathe* I'm ready..

He asks where I want to put the tatt.. I point to my right arm.. sideways.. above the scars I got when I was in high school. So this tattoo now has a deep layered meaning..I went in trying to pay homage to a friend..and ended up with a message AMEN!



I was in a car accident--it was like early summer before my junior year. I had FINALLY convinced my parents to let me go on a date with a boy in a car *HALLLUJJJERRRRRR*



The plan was to go to the movies, dinner, and brang my arse back to the house by 11pm. Well this ninja decides hey let's go visit some folks on the other side of town and see what they are up to. So I was cool with the folks so I didn't see anything wrong with it and I was crushing HARD on my date so he could have suggested going to the city dump to watch the sunset and I would have said that's so romanticals.. like a fool. Anyhoo--so we go and I'm there chatting with a classmate while he and her boyfriend decide to run down the road for something--well I realize that after a while has passed, that my curfew is coming up soon and I'm freaking out-- this was before cell phones so I couldn't call his arse and he didn't have a pager..don't look at me like that.. you don't know my age! LOL



Anty-hoo my classmate says let's go drive around and look for them. So I get in the car with her and we end up on this curvy road--now I didn't have my seat belt on until something told me I should put it on. Next thing I knew she lost control of the car..and the details are fuzzy but I remember seeing a fence and I covered my face up with my arm..and the window shattered. Chile I thought her arse was dead the way she was slumped over the steering wheel..she didn't have her seat belt on..and I just kept thinking this car is gonna blow up like they do on tv and I can't move her arse outta here but I gotta save us..but oh crap my arm is covered in blood..


Long story short.. my date is the one who was actually driving behind us..saw our car flip several times before it landed upright --I don't remember the car flipping but I assume when you see your life flash before your eyes, you kinda block ish out and all I cared about was that we were alive. Mind you, I didn't see the light of day for most of the summer because my parents were LIVID as if I were the one driving the car..something about me lying or some ish..chile IDK --shouldn't they have just been glad I made it through?! lawd I still wanna know what I missed that summer...




But, what I do know is after the doctors picked the glass outta my arm-- it healed..but the scars that run about 3 inches on my arm are a reminder that life is precious.. I am grateful to have made it out of that accident.

Fast forward to my most recent drama with my leg -- I would think sometimes WHY ME? But then I realized why not me? I have a platform to educate folks on how to do your research when electing to have surgery-- especially when it comes to fibroids--I am a walking testimony that I didn't let the fact that I could barely walk stop me from going hard in pursuit of my dreams..and I damn sure wasn't going out with just being satisfied with just walking with a cane. I am grateful that over the weekend..my leg was strong enough to hold me up in these damn wedge heeled boots I insisted on wearing as I went bar hopping.

I'm grateful that I was pushed out of my comfort zone because I would have stayed writing for SoulTrain.com forever so being pushed out led me to Jet which led me to Vanity Fair..and has landed me some amazing interviews and connections. However I also know that without SoulTrain.com I never would have met Kashif.



Most of all, I am grateful that I had Kashif in my life, even if for a short time, to remind me to Always (be) in Gratitude--appreciate what you have..where you have been..and look forward to where you are going.



So now, when I get mad or frustrated when things aren't going my way.. I just look down at my arm..and see my tattoo...my tattoo that reminds me of Kashif.. and the things that I am grateful for like family, life, friends.. my readers.. everything! While things aren't where I want them to be right now--this is my reminder to stay encouraged.. stay positive.. so for that-- I thank you Kashif for the reminder. I miss you so very much!

Add these songs to your gratitude playlist to get you started on your gratitude blogs!










*don't say ISH about these old school songs either!*


What do you guys have to be grateful for?

Until Later..
~Meik

What’s up Mofo-ville?



A couple of housekeeping things to talk about first:

Bloggers we are at the halfway mark for this month so I do hope you have already posted one blog for the #mofobloggerschallenge for September. If you need a reminder: Post 2-3 posts this month to get those creative juices flowing..any topic, just make sure you have a blog to participate cuz nawl you ain’t posting on mine! *I kid—I always welcome guest bloggers*

Secondly, in my quest to leap..no jump.. escape.. hell IDK what the best word is but get the entire hell out of television news sums it up, I have discovered that perhaps it is the name MOFO that can be off-putting..with that said, my @mofochronicles twitter handle will be changing to @meikchronicles in the next few days and eventually this blog will phase into that when I get the time to do it..but don’t look for it anytime soon LOL #cuztrife.


Alright now that we have that taken care of—let’s proceed.

Y’all know I love doing interviews right? I thought this time I’d tell you a story about the time I finally met one of my interviewees face to face and well, let’s just say, it was EVERYTHING but at the same well.. lemme just tell the story and let you judge for yourself.

Who is it Meik?

I’m glad you asked, BUT y’all know I can’t tell you WHO it was, but maybe when I’m old and gray and write a book about it, you’ll find out.

Picture this—I had initially done the interview via phone and we hit it off and made plans to hang out if he was ever in town. Most of the time when folks make these empty plans I just agree knowing I have no plans to leave my couch either. This dude actually came thru so win for him! We hung out, chatted, laughed, and discussed some industry ish.. not on a best friend level or anything… but chile.. the next day.. we had plans to meet up and schedules conflicted so it didn’t happen UNTIL he says he’s at the hotel chilling and I should meet his boy.



Um.. SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH.. whet?

Now, *scratches head* you have known me all of 2-3 days and now you want me to meet your boy?

So me being me..asks FUH WHAT? TO INTERVIEW?

He responds with –“or whatever”

Blink.

Blink.

Blink.



Y’all know what is about to happen don’t you? I don’t even have to finish this foolishness.

BUT I’m all about this “try something new, keep an open mind” bull ish lately so I figure, what’s the harm in seeing who his boy is???Because after all, what if this person can set me on the road to TV news freedom or he could be the prince charming I've been waiting for, or better yet, …eh I got nothing else. Needless to say I went.

I get to the hotel and it’s like some secret ops type of ish.. very hush hush.. one text every 10 minutes on where to go once I get there. Everything in my soul is screaming getcho arse back in the car and go home. It is 1 in the dayum morning..WHAT ARE YOU DOING? But me being me, I don’t listen. I even heard my grandma’s voice telling me to get in the car and take it on back to the house, but nope I don’t listen. I hop on the elevator and go up to the top floor..it’s eerie quiet up there. Lawd, am I about to be KILT? I lightly tap on the door.. this fool opens it a lil bit.. I push the door like who the hell is in here? Let me walk on in..see what's goings on..




I see a chick sitting at the table..but I don’t see another dude. Now.. I don’t get down with the lady on lady action but if you do that’s cool but for me and my household HELL NAWL. So he lets me in the door and I look around this big arse suite and I don’t see not a nar nother person in there. Is he trying to hook a threesome up? Cuz nawl.. I’m sure that is NOT in the abstinence rule book that I currently adhere to.. again WHY AM I HERE?



He then says his boy is in the bathroom, he’ll be out in a minute.

Hmmm.. ok.. my first thought is .. does he have bubble guts cuz at this point I’ve been here at least 5 min and he still hasn’t materialized. So I sit and chat with the chick at the table and realize oooooooh she is a groupie… now I’m intrigued. I can’t say that I’ve ever chatted with a groupie whose sole purpose is to hunch a celebrity for the evening.. just as I’m bout to put on my interviewing hat.. 10 min have gone by and the bathroom door opens and a child walks out.

....................blink...


.....................blink...


.......................blink...





Ok.. he wasn’t a child but he was the size of one. So I just keep on talking because this clearly is not the dude homie wanted me to meet. COULD NOT BE.

Because this is me..

You know it was.

I stand up towering over him..and I’m 5’5 so….. take what you will with that..

Y’all. I just…

I’m just not sure what is happening here or why?! *fights air*

He reaches to shake my hand and I’m a little funny acting when it comes to germs and shaking hands when you just came out the bathroom..nawl bruh. *insert head nod* what up tho?

So we all sit down at the table and chat.. I think dude needs a booster seat cuz without me looking under the table, I’m pretty sure his feet aren’t touching the ground, but he looks like the table is swallowing him up. But, me being the nice person I am, we chat a little bit about his career which by the way I thought he had just started out on the journey since he said he wasn’t making a lot of $$ and then he tells me he’s been doing it for 15 years..hell sir do you work in tv news too? Cuz..

Anyhoo as we are talking I notice my new buddy ole pal has moved onto to canoodling with this groupie chick and it now makes sense why I’m there. I am the “get my boy outta my way so I can get with this chick” card…and since I have no plans to entertain small fry, I do the next best thing.

*yawn* and claim I have to get up early in the mawnin so I must go!

While I think I’m shaking dude off my trail, he flips it and volunteers to walk me to the car. So off we go.. 4’9 (ok I’m exaggerating maybe he was 5 feet tall) and me—looking like I’m walking with my 9 year old son to the car. So I keep telling him it was nice that he offered to walk me to the car, but really I’m LITERALLY a big girl and can make it the last few steps to the car. BUT NO.. NAWLLLLLLL.. He wants to be a gentlemen. Now men, sometimes, just take the hint, be that triflin negro and just go when we say go.. this only makes it harder and you are still gonna get curved.

So we get to the car.. I open my car door.. he leans in like he’s gonna hug my waist.. I pull my best MJ Smooth Criminal lean to dodge it, throw out my hand and say nice to meeeeeet yeeewwwwwwww! BYEEE!!!




Don’t judge me like this. I see you reading this with judgement all in your eyeballs. I SEENT IT.

Just know.. that I was soooo mad at my new celebrity friend over this mess but decided you know what…. Sometimes it’s adventures like these that are needed to shake things up a bit and add a LITTLE …u know lemme just stop..I was mad..for about a day or two lol The end.



Lesson Learned: While this dude may not have turned out to be a love connection, or even a potential interview.. he was really cool— so if he's reading this I do hope he is chuckling.. but the whole incident was hilarious and you know, I think it’s still okay to have an open mind, but—look here—if you just met me… don’t try hooking me up with someone..YOU DO NOT KNOW ME AND THE TYPES OF FOOTBALL PLAYER BUILD TYPE OF MENS I LIKES LOL

~Meik

*tip toes in* I know..I know..but heyyyyy Mofo-ville! I know it's been a minute since I've posted but I'm baaack (for now lol). Let's get this out of the way before I jump into the point of this blog--this month I challenge all the triflin bloggers like myself to post at least 2-3 blogs to get our creative juices flowing and bring our blogs back to life. Any topic is cool..just make sure you have your own blog to post on! Be sure to share your links with me either in the comments or on social media.. cool? Cool.

Now..let's get into my first post of the month. September is my birthday month..GO VIRGOS! With my birthday right around the corner (9/11) I have been going between sitting in a corner rocking and crying that I'm getting older than I'm ready for and wondering where in the hell I went wrong because I still am not where I thought I would be at this age and trying to look back over the years to see if I have learned any dayum thing at all.

What you talking about Meik?

I'm glad you asked! Bear with me..this blog is a look back on the things that I have learned so far in my 30's. (I think I just low key told y'all I'm old! LOL)

1. Everybody is not your friend:

Allow me to elaborate. If you can't pick up the phone in a time of need and call certain folks--cuz they either send you to voice mail, ignore your texts, or hell change their number.. more than likely--that ain't ya friend. If they can't support you and have your back or even just shoot the ish with you--nawl ain't ya friend. Several folks I THOUGHT were friends over the years..just weren't..they were acquaintances that I now keep at a distance. (look at yourself and wonder if that's you LOL)--not everybody wants to see you succeed so some will tell you they will help you..and then lo and behold they get missing until they need something. Others just want you to be their sounding board and could give two damns about what you are going through.. again..not your friend.

2. Forgiveness is necessary:

I have held on to so much hurt and anger over King Mofo (he's the one that broke my lil heart into 1000000001 pieces and why I started blogging) anyhoo.. that hurt and anger got me nowhere..Unfortunately it took until just a year or so ago before I finally really realllllllly got some closure and was able to look him in the face and realize he ain't what I want or need anymore so I let go and forgave him and them trifling hoes he cheated on me with. See....okay maybe I still have a smidgeon of petty left.



3. Family is Everything!

Losing all of my grandmothers (I had 3--one was a step-grandparent) over the last few years has made me realize that work is work.. it will be there..family won't. I wish I could take back every single time I missed a family gathering, holiday, visits..all that because I had to work. I also realized that taking it back now won't bring them back but I sure wish I had those extra memories. So now I try to cherish every moment spent with family even when they tick me off to high heaven.

4. Embrace who you are:

For years I have struggled with weight, my self-esteem (a mofo cheating on you will do that ish to you --see more petty) and really trying to figure out just WHO Meik is..and by gawd I think I figured it out finally and am able to accept that this is me.....take me as a I am..a little pudgy in the middle (thanks fibroids) with a slight limp, and I'm a Jackson family loving, old school music loving chick that collects vinyl, and I'm a cheerleading judge that loves to write..I'm a lil shy..I cuss a lil bit..but I luh God.



5. This season of single is here for a reason:

Like most, I'm OVER being single and have been single for hell *counts* well a lot of years.. but one thing that I am sure of is..I needed to be single because I wasn't healed from the demise of my previous 8 year relationship. I needed to get to know me, heal, and figure out what it is I'm actually really looking for and throw away the 50 mile long list that I had of my requirements for a mate.. cuz lawd knows half of these mofos I went out with didn't even meet the top 5 --eh you live and learn I guess. Going into this next year has me excited about the possibilities that maybe just maybe bae is right around the corner!

6. I am not built for the hoe stroll:
I'm not knocking anyone who is comfy and prefers to go the casual sex route with any and everyone that tickles their genitals but for me and my household..nawl. After my breakup and trying to basically replace what I thought I had lost--I realized that this ain't for me.. I prefer to be in a relationship and not deal with all the "oooh catching feelings but I still wanna play games and have drama" ish-- so much so that I have been abstaining for quite some time (yearssss actually--judge if you want to chile) -- The struggle of abstaining is real when you have a fine arse dude that can hold a conversation and has a twinge of act right in front of you.. but ahem.. let me focus.. stimulate me mentally and then we'll see where it goes physically mmmk?



7. Hone your craft and don't be ashamed of it!

Like I said before I didn't really tap into my writing much until I got my heart broken repeatedly--and even then it took a while to find my voice. During my writing journey I stumbled upon something else I love besides blogging and that is doing interviews and telling the stories of some of our favs from back in the day..and even some of the current stars. Each interview that I have done has taught me lessons, I've made some great friends along the way, and more doors have opened. However, I don't get too comfortable--I still work my arse off to make sure I'm delivering a top notch quality interview--I do my research--I go to you guys to see what you want to know..and I wave my magic wand of words to make sure I make the subject and myself look like we have some sense.. basically hone your damn craft--but know that the work is never done..keep at it! I got picked on a lot for the types of interviews I chose to do..but look who ended up in Vanity Fair..where you at bruh?

8. Eating humble pie isn't as tasty as you'd like but it's needed:

Chile that Facebook "On This Day" feature will reveal all kinds of ish..for me it's shown me that from 2008-2012 I was an unbearable cocky arse mofo. Lemme explain-- appearing on a national television show in 2007 low key blew my head up but what humbled me a lil bit was not being able to find a job because of my portrayal on the show. Fast forward a few years because I still thought I WAS EVERYTHANG-- fibroids said "hey girl.. you think you bad..lemme add on some weight" ..and take it a step further get them thangs removed and then I'm half arse cripple.. I believe I have eaten a big arse piece of humble pie. I quickly humbled myself when I couldn't walk..couldn't do the things I used to..(see other blogs for the deets) but I literally had to realize that patience is a virtue and I needed to calm my arse down and stop being so... just..ughhhh thank goodness for growth right?

9. Sometimes YOU get in the way:

Sometimes the biggest obstacle in our way is well... US. I have an opportunity looming ahead of me now and I keep talking myself out of it cuz.. well I guess I like road blocks or something but maybe it's my virgo nature to look at things from all angles..but either way I'm in my own way. I have missed countless opportunities --because I was scared. Fear is a mofo.. but I have learned you have to get out of your own way! Step out on faith! (that really sounds good when I type it out but....)

10. Lastly, pretty boys ain't ish! LOL Just kidding! Seriously, this one is I have learned to walk away when it is evident that your crush is just not that into you. STORY OF MY LIFE CHILE!:

If you follow me on social media, you know I stay with a list of crushes..but there are a couple that I have had for a long time that reach all the way back to high school (let me just pause right here to say them mofos aged like fine wine and look so delicious but I digress).. and while it took me a long time to realize it, I finally said 'bish if he was interested, you wouldn't have to dayum reach out to him all the time, you wouldn't get stood up every time y'all make "plans," and he would actually oh I don't know... ACT interested?' Whew, another tough pill to swallow but a much needed slap in the face. Don't waste your time on mofos that ain't interested and don't want you. In the end, you are the only one who is walking around with hurt feelings and a pity party.


The ultimate lesson for me is to live life to the fullest and enjoy every single moment and not to give one hot darn about what anyone says.. I'm me.. take it or mofo'n leave it.



Of course there are more lessons but I thought I'd share some of them with you guys. Hopefully you learned something as well :)

So tell me dear readers..what are some lessons that you have learned in the past 5-10 years?

Bloggers--I will be looking for your posts this month!

Until Later..

~Meik