My 12 Play-My Story

Yo I got 12 things to say.. and 12 ways of saying it...

Do you mind.....if I give you some of myyyyyyyy.......12 Play???

What's up Mofoville?! It's been a long time but I AM BACK! Let's pause and bow our heads and thank God that today is the day the Lord has made, and 20 years ago on November 9, 1993, HE allowed 12 Play to come into our lives. Amen and let's body roll!

Now most of us can remember our first tapes, our first record, album, cd, and digital download purchase.. and there are some albums along the way that just hit you right in your soul and you still jam to it years later. 12 Play is one of those albums. Put aside all the legal drama that R Kelly has gone thru cuz this ain't the purpose of this post, it's a blog to celebrate all the 12 ways a mofo is supposed to love on you and sweat your baby hair out.

Do you recall when you got the 12 Play album Meik?

I'm glad you asked cuz I sho nuff do!

I recall it was a cold day in the mountains of Asheville, and it was a time in my life that cheerleading ruled everything, I ate, breathed, slept, everything cheerleading, so I was only checking for Michael Jackson songs or songs that could work for dance routines and ish at the time. Also at the time there was a well..let's just call him bugaboo that I couldn't seem to shake. He would call my house all the time ( I wish I could recall how he got my number but that's neither here nor there) and he would constantly tell me how much he liked me. He would come to our games and didn't even go to our high school, it got to be a lil much when folks would be like "Ohhhhh you are bugaboo's girl!" jflk;asdjfkl;adjf;klsdj;fjasd;fasdfsdj; <-----curses!! Nawl..Nawl..NAWL. So what it boils down to is I wasn't interested in him, and he had a bad lil habit of lying about everything. So anyway, he calls me up probably a few weeks after the album had already been released and says he has a gift for me. Yeah ok.. I know you lie. This mofo CLAIMS he walked from West Asheville to my part of town to deliver this gift (but I bet he got that arse on the bus cuz it's too cold in the mountains for all that ish) and he knocks on the door. I answer...he hands me a brown paper bag that looks like it's been thru some things and says Merry Christmas..here's your gift. I open the bag and the light shined down on the R Kelly 12 Play album. Thanks dude! But wayment.... wayyyyyyyyment.... The cover is all cracked and dented...the plastic has already been ripped off.. Ummm..... He says oh, that's the way it came. Now mind you I'm in high school at this time and may not be the brightest or the most savvy but dammit I KNOW cd's don't come like this. He mumbles and says he has to go and high tails it out of our yard. I run to my stereo to play it...................cd is scratched to the highest of high.. and I just..............well.. I guess it's the thought that counts..but who gives someone a damaged cd to prove their love or lust probably in this case?!!!! luckily my deddy did something to the cd so I could listen to it without all the skipping n ish.. tho if he knew what Kells was singing about I wonder if he'd let me listen to it? LOL.. Anyway.. Happy Anniversary 12 Play ... some of y'all were probably conceived off this joint.. This song is one of my favs off the album..do you have a fav?


Lesson Learned: Keep body rolling to 12 Play..it's the ish 20 years later.. that's how you define classic music.

Until Later..
-Meik

Reflections on Grandparents Day

What's up Mofoville?!

Happy Grandparents Day! :)

As the days turn into months, the loss of my beloved grandmother has NOT gotten easier..y'all lie :) In just a few days I'll turn 28 again..on 9/11 (shut up...I already know what you guys are thinking..just go with me on this)... and this is the first year that when I go to the mailbox, a birthday card with my grandmother's handwriting and a $5 bill won't be in there. The phone won't ring with her laughing in my ear trying to sing happy birthday, and she won't be waiting by the phone the next day to find out what birthday shennanigans I have managed to get myself into.

If that's not enough to send you down a strawberry limerita well of despair...add in the other ish going on in my life..

Not only am I STILL trying to bounce back from a simple procedure to remove fibroids back in June (that I can't really go into right now)..the hits just keep coming. And if one more mofo'n person asks me WHEN I'm coming back to the plantation I just might snap.

But this blog isn't about the dark tunnel that I am currently in..it is really to just honor Grandparents Day. Hell, I didn't know that existed until today, I celebrate my grandparents everyday.

Granted the past few weeks I have cried my eyeballs out to the point I am walking around with puffy lids simply because I NEED MY GRANDMA RIGHT NOW. She was my strength..the person that could make sense of all things that seemed like the debbil himself crafted it, and she could make me laugh and see that all my fears and frustrations were just silly. Today on Grandparents Day I'm reminded that I still honor her and her advice (as well as ALL of my grandparents) every minute of every day.. what you mean Meik?

You know I love lists right? Well here we go..

1. Clean pannies with no holes-cuz you never know what might happen..and because of this gawdly incision across my abdomen that still doesn't feel too comfy..I am the queen of the granny pannies...unfortunately I forget they are pulled up to the high heavens way above my shorts..imagine having your shirt tucked into your granny pannies standing at the front of a long line in Starbucks. Yep. My life. LOL

2. Carry mace when you go for walks..ok so I have YET to follow this advice, but the good news is..I remember it so that counts for something right?? Tho, a couple of weeks ago I could have used this when I had a stare down with a scraggly dog in the neighborhood..I don't do dogs..atall. Hell I can barely walk right now much less run from the scariness that is Rover.

3. Always say thank you, and show your appreciation. It's always nice to have someone to care something about you. I remember my grandma telling me that about my granddeddy when she was sick...right before she added it was too late for her to start over and find someone new LOL.

4. Sometimes you have to say NO! Don't let people run over you. This proves to be true in every aspect of life..I'll be damned if I let a certain debbil run over me, and don't feel not one ounce of sympathy to the ones that let her do it. I know this one is cryptic, but my grandma knew exactly who I was talking about and this was her advice.

5. When in doubt on how to make some ish..just go to the store in buy it LOL. If you followed my blog on the disappearing cupcakes then this one makes total sense.


I could go on and on but the point is..the advice and lessons you learn from your grandparents are priceless and money can't buy that..so appreciate your grandparents while you still have em, take it from me, it hurts like a mofo and a half when you can't pick up the phone to call them to hear that advice...I am so grateful for the many conversations we had so I can literally apply some of that advice to various situations. I know she'd also be telling me to quit telling her biz on this inna-net LOL..

Bottom line tho..I love my grandparents..all of em. I'm especially blessed to have been able to know my great-grandmothers also.

Do you guys have any advice from your grandparents to share???

-Until Later..
Meik

A Grey Bug-A-Boo

*sigh* One day mofo friends.. I shall learn to just STAY in the house!!!

What happened Meik?

I'm so glad you asked.

Grey is back. Who is Grey? Well if you are an avid reader of this blog then I shouldn't have to refresh your mofo'n memory, but because I'm sugar and spice and everything that's kinda nice..here's a refresher:

http://www.themofochronicles.com/2013/02/but-he-nice-thopart-1.html



http://www.themofochronicles.com/2013/02/stuntin-like-my-deddy-part-2.html

Caught up now? Good let's proceed.

So here I am 8 weeks out from surgery and heading to my first physical therapy appointment. (mind you.. I didn't have ish done to my leg in surgery..but it's janky and hey that's another story for another time) So I arrive early for my appointment..SHOCKER..cuz I never get anywhere on time..much less early. Anyhoo.. whip Thriller into the parking space, roll out the car (yes it's a roll..thanks to a janky hip and leg..I can't just get out of the car like normal people right now) And I begin my long journey across the parking lot..ok I'm parked in front of the building but when your leg is f'd.. it seems like a long walk.

I hobble along..I hear my name being called.. F. Who the hell knows me up here..I specifically picked a PT so I wouldn't run into anyone. F. F. AND F.

I slowly turn around........................actually hoping..wishing..praying it could be someone ...perhaps even my crush has come to his senses..but since this is Meik..naw..bruh.. naw sis.. it didn't go down like that.. INSTEAD......

I see Grey speed walking towards me with a big grin on his face, gray chest hairs just blowing in the wind tangled up in that medical alert necklace.

Ain't this about a mofo and a half?!

So I roll my eyes and say "Oh hey".. He catches up to me and starts rambling and stuttering about how good I look (Let me give you a visual..I had on a red MJ Tee, Reebok gym shorts, and white/gray sneakers and my hair was pulled back in a raggely ponytail..I'm not here for his lies) ....

Sir..I'm gonna be late..so...........

Grey: Well, listen I was just wondering why you didn't want to go out with me again. I thought we had fun at breakfast at Bob Evans and the convo was good.

Me: *Blanket Jackson Blank Stare* and then I looked at his hands while he was talking..this ninja's nails are longer than mine!!! WTF?!!!!!!!

*sigh* Sir... No.. WE didn't have fun.. YOU had fun. I don't want to go out with you because I'm not interested and the age difference is entirely too great.

****now for anyone else that has some sense..you would think that answer would suffice right?!***

Grey: I don't understand. I like you and I want to go out again. What you doing later?

Me: I'm gonna be late for PT and I'm busy and we aren't going out..ever.

Grey: Well you know some people your age act like people my age, or people my age act like people your age, so don't knock it til you try it.

*in my head I am thinking..oh I would try it if Jackie Jackson came knocking at my door..or even Denzel..but YOU SIR ARE NOT SESSY! OR ENTERTAINING*

Me: Well, that's not for me, I'd prefer to stick to folks my own age that I have something in common with. Again, I have to go. Nice to see you again..take care.

Grey: Well wait, what are you doing here, you look good tho.

Me: I just told you physical therapy. I had surgery. I gotta go. Wait. Are you going in the same building?!

Grey: You don't look sick. You look good tho.

If this ninja say that ish ONE MORE TIME LIKE I'M GONNA CHANGE MY MIND!

Grey: Actually I'm going to the chiropractor..I got in a car accident,totaled my car, but I'm okay tho. You know I still go to Atlanta every other weekend, so I'm here this weekend if you want to go out.

Me: I don't. But.. well I gotta go .. take care.

I limp off into the building to find the directory so I can figure out where the PT office is..

THIS MOFO................

slides in front of the directory...KNOWING DAYUM HAYLE WELL I AM TRYING TO READ IT!

Grey: So what you doing later.. you like football?

Me: I'm busy. I don't like anything. I am busy. Can you move?!

Grey: Listen, I was thinking about going to a sports bar tonight to watch the game, why don't you meet me there for drinks.

Blink Blink Blink

Clearly that gray hair in his ears is blocking his hearing.. NO NINJA!!!

I find the office location and limp off to the elevator..thinking he finally left.

*ring ring ring*

I start digging in my purse for my phone.. and hear "Hey.. That's me calling you so you have my number! Call me when you get done with your therapy and I'll tell you where I'm watching the game so you can come!"

ldfkjasd;jflakdjfg;kladjfja;kladjsfkds;fljs MOFO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just start punching the button for the elevator praying..hoping..wishing..calling on God and all his heavenly angels for this elevator to show up and save me.

I see him walking towards me..and YES the elevator is here.. I limp on and hit the close button before he can even say one more word.

I think I hate him.

Oh, you think that was the end? Noooooooo of course not..someone that persistent doesn't give up that easily. I left therapy and saw he had called 2 more times and left a message saying to call him. I see why he is "allegedly single"... tho I still think he has a wife down in the A.

Of course the weekend didn't go by without several calls (each one sent to ignore.. like this mofo can't even be thrown in the friendship prison..he is in solitary no chance in hell of parole..leave me be!).. even text messages have gotten ignored.

At what point does a mofo just give up and realize I AM NOT INTERESTED IN YOUR OLD ARSE?!

Lawd just typing this has my blood pressure boiling.. I swear tho..I could hear my grandma's laughter in my ear the entire time..


The epitome of a bug-a-boo:




Lesson Learned: Continue showing up late to ish.. cuz showing up early only got my nerves twisted up. On a more serious note, I think the lesson here is to pay attention to the red flags and not give out my mofo'n number or accept any more dates from someone that's "nice".. Dating outchea is rough but doggone it..I'd rather be by myself than deal with a wormy mofo.

What would you guys have done in this situation? How should I handle his continued calls aside from blocking?

Until Later..
Meik

Some Mofo'n Perspective

What up Mofos?! As you know I love guest bloggers.. so please welcome DJ Royale to the stage.. he's gonna teach y'all a lil about relationships n ish...ok no he's not trying to be a relationship expert, but he is giving us an inside look to the inner workings of a man's mind...

And as usual.. my commentary is sprinkled throughout in bold print.. ENJOY!



**********************
I just figured out what I wanted to say w/o ranting here it is; but first this disclaimer: I AM NOT A WRITER, NOR AM I TRYING TO BE DEEP WITH THIS, I am just telling you what I see and what I think I may know about life.

With that said let us begin. I am guest starring on this blog because of the numerous conversations me and Meik (can I call her that??) have had (I wish I was a comedian because I would surely take that act on the road) and she thought It would be interesting to get my thoughts on relationships.


Sure you can call me Meik.. after all, that's my name on this blog.. proceed...


I am not going to go in any particular order so here goes.

As I have begun to look online and read blogs and opinions about relationships and talk to my not so close associates about how they feel about relationships and what they expect and want out of them, there is one indelible fact that I have seen from both men and women and that is:



MEN ARE FLAWED.


*bangs tambourine* yes lawd jeezus they sho nuff are! FLAWED, F'd and wayment..lemme let you finish..



Ok, now that we have that out of the way and most of the women have said “ain't that the truth” and “amen” we can get down to real business of it and that is my response to the above statement.


uh oh.


SO WHAT if men are flawed, It makes us real people prone to mistakes and mishaps and bad decisions, which is just fine by me. I had tried the superman thing and I'll be damned if I ever do that again. NOT WORTH IT!!!!!!!!(And for the record I am REALLY single currently).


so basically men are the bad apples at the grocery store that are bruised and ... y'all supposed to have tough skin and man up but I'm sleep tho..


I think that the microwave society we live in had conditioned us for a few things, which we either knowingly or not so portray on to others. First there has to be someone to blame. I mean for the most part there is NO WAY that you could be single because the person that you could spend the rest of you life with either has not crossed your path or has and it didn’t work or blah blah blah right?


Well that's my theory, cuz the one I WANT I haven't met him yet.. so.... but carry on...


There always has to be someone to blame “their fault mentality” because you in all of your wonderfulness as you wait in the clouds for you superman or superwoman to grace your earthly presence could never be the problem right? Second, relationships are hard work and that’s all I have for that one.


hard work that these days folks don't wanna put forth any effort...


I have debated many women during the last couple of years about the timeline of dating and how it matriculates in the early stages to even get to the dating stage and one thing I have learned and seen in this most important of stages is this. (And this does not go for all women – I hate I even have to say that but ppl are really sensitive these days)


you got that right..ole sensitive in their feelings mofos..


WOMEN DON’T DO MUCH WORK IN THE BEGINNING STAGES OF PRESENTATION


pause. screeeeeeech.... wayment...


It has been my experience that in this beginning stage that the man presents (introduction) himself and then the two ppl begin to get acquainted. For most women this is a proving stage for them. “He has to prove he is worth my time” as one of my sorority sisters put it. The one thing that disturbs me about this is that women don’t do much in this stage. They are watching and waiting to be wooed, wined and dined, which is perfectly fine but life goes on and if you’re not paying attention you may miss it; life that is. I have learned that everything is better when you participate, This stage to me is the most important because it builds foundation in a relationship and I will leave it at that (we are all grown)


*raises hand* I must be missing something cuz in MY experience as this blog has proven..most mofo'n men aren't putting forth a dayum thing but their peen so they can text the pic or try to shove it ... sorry lemme get back to the present.. but the point is.. these days..ain't much dating going on so maybe neither party is putting forth any effort except to undress..


Last thing I have noticed is that people seem to be looking for the “formula” to make relationships work, they read books, blogs (even this one), watch shows and movies, even go to conferences and join single ministries (yes, I did put that in their for the church folk.


They listen to the likes of Black Ty aka Tyrese, Steve Harvey and other pretend relationship "experts" on da Twitter and other innanets..


Prelude to another blog post) trying to find the best way for two people to meet get to know each other and fall madly in love and spend the rest of their lives together.


The problem is the people who write and produce this stuff don’t know me or you or anyone else better than they know the weather each day. A person’s journey is exactly that. WE are all different so our situations even with similarities will never be the same. Life is an everyday experience to be enjoyed to fullest and I hope all that read this recognize that fact and live it up even in relationships.


U betta preach! We all have to discover our own path and create our OWN story..


I purposely didn’t deal with morals and ethics in this because I am no better than anyone one else so you do what you do. I will leave you with two corny sayings that have been said to me and have stuck with me for a long time dealing with life. The first “When you prepare to travel and go on a journey, when you pull out your luggage IT IS ALWAYS EMPTY” my great Grammy gave me that one and I’ve never got it until recently (R.I.P. Grammy) and the last one I will write it bigger so that all can see.



THE BIGGEST LIE IS OFTEN THE ONE YOU TELL TO YOURSELF



I hope this post was entertaining at best, if you feel like this was immature rambling and not worth your reading; WELL you just read it anyway so deal with it



GHOST



DJ ROYALE

Meik's lesson learned:
So the lesson I took from this post is.. You can't rely on ish to navigate your way through these dating waters..but you do have to step back, assess yourself, your situation and figure out how to make the most of your dating experience.. on a side note that is probably another blog post.. WHY COME women always gotta be blamed for the dumb ish men do?!

Anyhoo..so dear readers.. do you agree with these observations????

If you would like to write a guest blog..hit me up.. email me at shameika@themofochronicles.com or tweet me!

Until Later..
Meik

One Way Networking Street

What's up Mofos?!

Since I've been out on leave from work (I had surgery a few weeks ago for those that haven't kept up) I have had nothing but time on my hands..and with time.. comes thinking.. lots and lots of thinking.

I realized.. I AM PIST.. (not just PISSED but PIST!)

Why Meik? What's wrong?

It's no secret that I have been looking for other opportunities..looking to spread my wings and fly fly fly like a bird...eh well you get the point.. basically.. after several years of doing the same dayum thing day after day.. you get bored, no longer challenged, and after you KEEP getting passed over and overlooked for ish..well needless to say it's time to go where you are wanted and your talents are welcomed.

Anyhoo.. long story short...in my quest for change, like most folks tell you, rely on your network, make the net work for you, and network!

What's funny about that is.. I have networked my arse off for the past 5-6 years, gotten some awesome amazing connections and some of that spiraled into side hustles that I was able to make more connections etc..

EXCEPT... often times it seems like a one way street and I'm the mofo driving down it the wrong way.

Lemme 'splain..

I can't tell you how many times I have tweeted, emailed, stood on my head, called, twerked and damn near begged for folks to pass my resume along.....................................................................................................chirp chirp chirp.. <----them's the crickets I get.

But you let folks need a press release forwarded to the appropriate news folks, or want to use MY contacts to get some ish..then you never hear the end of it.

Example: Someone regularly sends press releases to me and is well connected (ALLEGEDLY cuz I am ASSUming that's true) .. well I ask that person if they know anyone (well for story purposes here names and places have been changed) that works at The Golf Channel (I don't know ish about golf but again..this is just an example) and they tell me they have a friend in management there. I ask would you mind passing my resume along, I have applied on the website multiple times.

THE MOFO'N RESPONSE: "Well, you can't leave, because then who would I send my press releases to?"

dkfljskl;dfj;kasdjf;klsdjfkl;dasj;fkldjsfljsefkjas;d (if u could see the force that I just used to type that long drawn out curse)

So.. the moral of that example is..mofos are cool as long as the position I am in HELPS THEM.. but when ole Meik Meik is in dire need of help.. it's not an option to lend a helping hand. mmmk... got it..

Another example.. the resume that just sits collecting dust, because mofos never follow thru. Me-if I tell you I'm going to pass your resume along.. I do it. It's up to YOUR skills and TALENT to speak for you, and if I believe in you I'll put in a good word. Maybe I'm too dayum nice.

But 5-6 years later.. nice hasn't gotten me anywhere but a headache and a bitter 'tude.. so if I ignore your press releases ... you know why.


What's even more frustrating is people saying to me: oh you ain't never gonna leave, you'll ALWAYS be there... you aren't trying, or you aren't looking, or whatever the case may be..STFU. If you know me, then you know that I have done everything short of standing in the middle of 77 during rush hour nekkid begging for someone to help a sista out and give me a chance..and do you think comments like that HELP? THEY DON'T!

Lesson Learned: You can't rely on anyone but God to help you out. Whatever opportunity that is out there will be for me and nobody will be able to block it, take it away, or even stifle it for their own messy arse gain. I must keep searching..
My granddeddy told me last night, you'll stumble across the right opportunity and you'll be glad for all the closed doors, because this one open door was meant for you.

Aren't grandparents the best voice of reason everrrrr? (tho if I hear one more "NO!" I might snap)

Have y'all had this happen? How did you handle it?

Until Later..
Meik

Mofo'n Bedside Manner

What's up Mofoville?!



If you follow me on twitter, then you already know I am sick and shut in for the next few weeks after having surgery..so today makes 2 weeks since surgery and I finally felt like blogging..and lemme just sum it up with this.. if you decide to become a nurse, can you make sure you have some great bedside manner about ya self?!

What you mean Meik?

Well, this was my first time staying overnight in the hospital, in fact they loved me so much they let me stay 3 won-glorious nights. Aren't I a winner?! (I'm being sarcastic)..

Let me tell you.. this hospital in Uptown Charlotte tried to kill me.. Oh okay maybe not literally but lemme just run down the list of WTF moments...

1. There is a problem when a nurse tells me she hasn't read my chart and yet she's about to inject some ish into my IV. Ma'am.

2. There is a problem when a doctor (who isn't MY doctor) walks in to the room to discuss my "thyroid surgery" and there's nothing wrong with my thyroid..in fact he's at the wrong end of the body for the surgery I'm having...again.. does anyone in this hospital read?!

3. There is a problem when I ask the nurse for help to get up (I have an f'n FALL RISK bracelet on-listen no jokes.. when they cut your f'n stomach open.. you have issues getting up..) but anyhoo..she tells me.. "You got it.. you can do it on your own".. ma'am..HELP ME GET UP!

4. There is a problem when this mofo'n ice pack has leaked all over my sheets and gown and no one bothers to help a sista out til an hour later.. listen, if I wanted to sit in wet ish I wouldn't have called ya'll an hour ago!!!!

5. There is a problem when my IV machine thingie is beeping like crazy..and nurses are out at the nurses station IN FRONT OF MY ROOM sniggling and carrying on like they don't hear the ish. Then when the heffa FINALLY shows up.. she asks me why didn't I call someone. I DID.. 30 MINUTES AGO!

6. There is a problem when I have a room full of folks visiting and the nurse comes busting in to ask "have you passed gas today?" *blink blink* must we do this NOW?

7. There is a problem when not ONE NURSE bothers to inform me that I have to do that breathing contraption cuz..well.. they just didn't bother to do their job.

8. There is a problem when I ask for Jello to eat and it takes 4 hours to make it to my room. There's an even BIGGER problem when my mother goes to ask the mofo'n nurses for ice cream for me and they tell her to go to the freezer to get it herself. WTF.

9. There is a problem when I'm asking what my temperature is and the nurse tells me she doesn't know, the tech takes that.. ummm ain't that what charts are for or am I just ......? *blink*

10. There is a problem when I ask to see the manager and the nurse asks me if there is a problem. No bish.. I just like talking to managers with this hateful arse look on my face as I struggle to get up out this bed to choke you.

Summing this up.. my hospital stay was NOT a pleasant one..and while I wasn't expecting it to be all roses, it was definitely more like thorns in my arse. What's even worse is I was on the floor with OB/GYN cancer patients (no I don't have cancer..I have no idea why they put me on that floor..but anyhoo..) but if the care that I was receiving was gar-baaaaaage then I can only imagine the care the patients that needed some TLC were getting horrible care. Damn shame.

Overall there was probably TWO nurses that were good, and one was the student nurse and the


Lesson Learned: Just cuz you hate your job doesn't mean you have to take it out on others. I've learned that the hard way, that you can NOT like your job, but you can still DO your job with a smile on your face and DO your job to the BEST of your ABILITY. Granted I work in a completely different industry where I don't have to deal with sick patients, and I get everyone has a bad day..but for an entire team of nurses and techs to have a bad 3 days? chile bye. Needless to say I WILL NEVER go back to that hospital..I don't care if my arm is falling off.. I'd have better luck trying to re-attach it with a sewing kit than waiting on them to do it.

Have you guys ever had a bad hospital stay?

Y'all stay healthy and happy!

Meik..

Friend Zoned Mofos

Hello Mofovillians!


Have you ever placed someone in the friend zone and they just REFUSE to play nice and stay there, instead they want to buck the system and become a "Breakout King" and become your new boo thang?




Or have you ever just blatantly told someone "look mofo, this ain't gonna work, we aren't suited for each other and being distant 'friends' is bout all it's gonna be?"

Oh so I'm the only one with this problem huh? mmmk..

What's going on Meik?

I'm so glad you asked. And by the way, since I will be sick and shut in for the next few weeks, you just might get more blog posts in between my naps post-surgery.. but anyhoo back to the discussion at hand.


Let's say girl meets boy, girl realizes IMMEDIATELY she ain't interested, but thinks boy is cool and places him in the friend zone.. or as some of my blog counterparts call it "friend zone prison" with no chance of parole.

Let's examine what the friend zone is shall we?

FOR ME..

I place men folks in the friend zone when I'm not interested in them romantically, physically, and hell sometimes mentally is even a stretch, but they are cool peeps and I don't want to cut off ALL communication but sometimes you have to throw some of em in the friend zone dungeon to never be heard from again..

Got it?

Now most of us folks that have had the lucky opportunity to be friend zoned know that there's usually no way in hell you getting out of that zone, unless you get bumped up a level to "a friend with benefits"..-Meik Meik don't play that.. but some of you do, and hey..no judgements from over here.. just keep your eyeballs peeled for red flags when you busy hunching and humpin cuz you could end up with a crazy, deranged janky eyeballed mofo but hey.. don't mind me. I'm sleep.

Then there are those that are determined to not take the friend zone as the final answer and they keep on and on and on til the break of dawn.

1. If I don't answer your calls.. EVER.. and you constantly get sent to voicemail..chances are... you just ain't what I'm looking for even in a friend at this point.

2. If I don't respond to your texts...well.......

3. If I don't take you up on ANY opportunity to hang out... chances are .. welp I just don't dayum wanna be bothered.

4. I am not a mind reader, so say WTF you mean and all this guess what I'm feeling ish..I'm not here fuh it. We grown. There is NO CHANCE FOR ROMANCE BRUH.

5. Sending cryptic messages on social media sites will get you ignored even more.

That's just a few of the things on my list for folks that won't stay *stomps and pushes HIM's head back down into friendship hell* where the f I want them to stay.

So, my question to you dear fam, how do you handle someone that you have friend zoned that won't take that at face value and stop trying to break out of the friend zone, ESPECIALLY if you have told them you aren't interested in them that way? Do you cut off all communication? Block em on every social media site? Change your phone number?

Lesson Learned: I probably need to just cut off all communication because my friend zone prison is clearly a minimum security prison and it doesn't work. My nerves are fried, died, and laid to the side *phone rings* F HIM calling again...

Until Later..

Meik..forever the friend zoned homegirl..never the girlfriend (that's another topic for another rainy blog day! Ya'll be good!