A Mofo'n Broken Promise but a New Beginning

Friday, November 23, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving..ehh or Black Friday.. awww f it Happy Holidays!

For the first time in years, I got to spend time with my family on the actual Thanksgiving holiday and eat dinner with them ect.. but this holiday was a little more important, it marked a new beginning for me.

What you mean Meik?

I'm glad you asked! ...and no.. it has nothing to do with gaining weight from eating lots of food..but more like shedding some weight.

Stay with me on this..

Remember this song? Lawd wasn't Christopher Williams just fine as frog hair? Anyhoo.. listen to what he's saying.. I'll wait.

Finished? Ok.. let's review..

".... Like a child's heart at play you know the things we used to say.... When we were in love we made.....
(Chorus) Promises, promises we don't keep Promises, promises..."

Get the point.. good..let's dance.. sorry bout slipped into my Janet Jackson mode right there.. but anyhoo.. I digress..

Promises. Promise. We don't keep.

Marinate on that one. Lemme explain where I'm coming from. Most of you know the story of King Mofo and if you're close to me, then you know while I've said I've let go and moved on, the truth is, I was still holding onto the past by still holding onto some keepsakes that he gave me. He gave me 2 promise rings and a bracelet, and another ring that I had been holding onto for years...the other ish was stolen last year, well before I was ready to let it go. Why? Hell, I don't know.. I guess I just wasn't 100% ready to say kick rocks. Maybe somewhere in the back of my mind I thought, he'll come crawling back and I can dent his forehead in with this ish, or maybe just maybe those empty promises would one day mean something...BUT we all know people make promise they can't and won't ever keep.

WELLLLP. Fast Forward x amount of years and none of the above has happened. So on this Black Friday.. I decided it's time. Time for me to break ties with the past, so that I can move forward. Maybe this is why I haven't found love, or hell even found someone to date more than one time..maybe it's time I officially close the chapter on that part of my life and finally mark it DONE. DONE. AND MOFO'N DONE.

*takes deep breath*

What did you do Meik?

No..I didn't set it off in a blaze of glory like I'm Waiting to Exhale (but I thought about it..hell) ..but I did something that would benefit me *sniggles* I took all that ish to the pawn shop. For over a year now, I've been telling myself I'm over him and I didn't really believe that myself until his birthday came and went, and for once I didn't reach out to wish him a happy bday..and truth be told he hasn't either in 2 years, so this wasn't a difficult decision. With my mama by my side (and after explaining to my deddy that there is no reason to keep the ish if the promises were all lies), I slid the ish across the counter and told the man I wanted to sell it.

There it is.. no taking it back. No jumping across the counter hanging onto the man's leg.. but here is the final piece..the nail in the coffin..the closure..well..the only closure I'm gonna get, because the ultimate closure would be that ninja telling me WHY he did the ish he did and ...lemme get back to the present and *inhale......exhale.....count to 10009034809374937545*

So..the man comes back and tells me how much he's willing to give me for it. Now, in the back of my mind, I'm thinking all along this ish probably wasn't real to begin with, and I was fully prepared to say I KNEW IT..THIS MOFO IS NOT ONLY A LIAR BUT A CHEAP ARSE BIZNITCH TOO! But nope.. the amount the man tells me, makes me blink.. and say oh, it was real. okaaayyyyyyy I'll take it..and you can have that ish.

Not one tear shed. Not one longing glance at the ish..not even a blink-away-a-tear moment..not even a sniff-snot. NOT NUFFIN. No heart palpitations, no staring, blank staring..just a sigh of relief and a weight off my shoulders.

I feel free. I have finally broken the chains that have been shackling me to the past. I can move forward without looking back. I am over King Mofo and it feels good to say it.

Lesson Learned: Don't let mofos rush you into getting over someone. You cure your heartache on your own timetable. Money helps n all LOL.. but if I had listened to my friends, I would have gotten rid of the ish years ago, but still would have the hurt feelings and crushed heart.. so I always say no one can tell you how long it will take you to heal and get over someone. No one can heal your heart but you, and God. But anyway, mofo chronicle-ites, I'm bout to get my hair did, get a cute new outfit, and get back to the world.. freedom never felt so good! I Promise that!

Until Later..

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  1. <3 it!!!! Yes we get over things on our own time. I know u prolly "Shamoned" across the floor and out the door with that money too.... good 4 u cuz I know mental and emotional freedom is so awesome ;o)

    best wishes in your new book of life

  2. I pawned a ring my ex gave me so that after I crossed I could buy these lame white outfits to wear with my linesisters to the club. Ha! Ha! I bought some food too. It was good.

  3. I really wanted the satisfaction of flinging the ish at his head..but I'll just go buy some ish now LMAO.

  4. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!! Proud of you! :-)


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