A Mofo's Rude 'Tude

Sunday, September 06, 2015

Hey Mofos!

You know this summer didn't go by without some mofoish activity! YOU KNOW BETTER RIGHT?

I told bits and pieces of this story on Twitter but some of you are pushy and wanted more words LOL So here ya go!

I just really wonder what the entire hell goes on in the minds of some folks, especially when they are invited somewhere for FREE and ............

What happened Meik?

I'm so glad you asked!

Motown the Musical is in town for a 2 week run and lemme just add it is one of the best musicals I have seen, ok hell, I am bias since I love ALLLLLLLL things old school and Motown for that matter--hell they gave us MJ! Anyway, I digress, so I had an extra ticket so I invited a friend that I know claims to love theater and since we'd gone out a few times, why not just go together? So IDK if I'd classify this as a date, y'all can tell me cuz you got all these new fangled got dayum rules and ish these days. I'm too old and too tired to keep up.

So.. prior to the show I was invited to attend a media event to stare and eyeball other members of the media because..well.. we're stuck up and don't mingle..sounds like the Charlotte dating scene huh? Imagine that. Anyway, we'll call him Bryan for the fun of it. Bryan was attending an event also and via text we thought we were gonna be at the same party but turns out there were a couple going on that evening. Either way, I had the tickets--but yet he tells me to brang my arse to the building where he is, mind you the building where I am WITH THE TICKETS has the show right downstairs and I'm all up in the open bar.. don't judge. Just take a sip...and another..and another..and one more!

So he finally agrees to meet me there and when he FINALLY shows up after going to the wrong place and blaming me for his lack of comprehension of a text with the exact location (this is the first of many blank stare moments), and his texts asking me if I have extra tickets for his friends, he arrives and greet him at the entrance only to get a oh hey and he makes a beeline to speak to someone he knows. Well, I grab my drink and head over to give him this gift bag for the guests since I had an extra one and I wait....and wait....and WAIT..hell I still don't know who that dude was talking to if that gives you any indicator.. so let's add RUDE MOFO to this list..

I don't know about y'all but I always introduce folks..if I can't recall your name.. I just say this is my friend Boo Boo and let y'all take the introductions from there.. I am not going to keep talking and act like you don't exist because WHY? Anyway.. *takes a sip* give him the gift bag and its in the shape of a record.. so it says MY GUY/MY GIRL on it and he informs me that it's gay. Oh.. well hell, you ain't gotta take it.

So as we are all heading to the show, I run into a fellow media-ite and we're chatting and I say this is my friend Bryan..and the media friend says, "nice to meet you, what do you do?" THIS MAN... Y'all..........................................responds with, "I'm just her hoe for the night." lsjf;akldsfjklasdjf;lkasdjflkadjsfladsjf;a

WTF DID HE JUST SAY?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I bout slid to the floor while making sure I didn't spill my alcohol *Thanks Bey*

So I just grab him and say excuse us..now had I not already given this fool his ticket I woulda sent him on his merry way, but I figure let's try to salvage this evening. I tell him I have to go to the restroom before heading into the show, and he says he's going to the concession stand.



This means, he ain't asked if I wanted a piece of got dayum ice or a napkin to make sure it don't melt. So I blink and wait..and blink and he turns away and walks off.

Hmmmph...is this a new fangled rule where I shoulda said "GET ME A DRANK" or .. I don't .. chile..

So then the ushers inform us that we have to hurry up because the show is about to start, we discover we have a couple flights of long sets of stairs to hurry down. If you have been following me, you know I have nerve damage in my left leg and while it's not 100%, I still struggle on stairs with walking and have to go slow and I even told him let's take the elevator..and I was wearing some baby wedges which makes walking a little more difficult (hey I was trying to be cute!)...well clearly he wasn't trying to hear take the elevator, so we are walking down the stairs, me a bit slower than him..and I tell him go ahead I'll catch up.. He turns and yells "THIS IS WHY YOU NEED TO GO TO CROSSFIT AND LOSE WEIGHT AND GET YOUR STAMINA UP!"



This mofo.. who has NEVER ONCE asked in the almost 2 years that I have known him about my leg...decides the best response is "well when can you wear heels then?"

I mean, how much time do you get if you push someone down the steps in front of everyone cuz................

I respond with probably never, and your concern with my heels has nothing to do with the journey I have been on and these wedges may be as high as they get, and he says well at least you won't have ugly veins in your legs like some ladies will since they wear heels all the time. Is this some back handed arse compliment?!

Chile.. I shoulda sat in the aisle, but no.. the kicker for me was him trying to tell ME.. lover of all things Jackson family related, that Berry Gordy never signed the Jackson Five. BIH WHET? I get it, not everyone is up on who was on the Motown label, but dammit.. EVERYBODY knows that Berry gave the J5 their start.. but no..he tells me it wasn't Berry..it was Diana Ross that put them on.

Excuse me while I count the f's that I no longer have for his company...

and DONE. I AM OVER THIS EXCURSION..DATE.. FRIEN--ehhh I aint even calling his arse a friend.

The ultimate slander came when he said he don't like Stevie Wonder. WHO HASN'T BEEN INFLUENCED BY STEVIE?! All of the music today... most folks cite Stevie or hell at least someone off the Motown label as an influence..but to not like Stevie?! chile...

Needless to say there was a lot of eye rolling and pretending like I was there alone after this LOL

Afterwards, a please don't walk me to my car, me and my nerve damaged leg would rather take our chances of being snatched up then having to deal with this mofo.

I enjoyed the play..just not the company.. so needless to say, it made me realize his true character.. that to say the hateful things about me and my leg when I've fought, pushed and rehabbed this leg to where it is today over the past 2 years and lost 16 pounds after that gawd awful medicine made me gain weight...to be made to feel like all of your efforts were pointless...nawl bruh.. I'm good on this friendship..if that's what it ever was.

Lesson Learned: Folks will reveal their true nature.. if you let em stick around long enough. I should have used my good leg and kicked him in the balls and called it a night. While the comments hurt my feelings, I realized one thing.. I'm tough and someone's rude behavior ain't gonna change the progress that I've made.

Stay classy!


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  1. You gotta give stupid people one chance then cut em off at the toenails. Boom. Sliced ninja. Maybe a written test or a quiz....

  2. Girl I am heated. The nerve of this ninja. Disgusting freak. Email me his number so I can give him a Jamaican cuss out hahaha - KJ


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