The Long Goodbye

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Hola Amigos! Ok f it..I'm sticking to my normal salutations and greetings cuz each one gets even more ridiculous..
Wow.. 2010 has flown by hasn't it..(check out that fancy schmancy MJ Calendar)!? As I sit here and reflect on the roller coaster of a year it's been I totally intended to blog about the top mofos of the year, but that's not what's on my heart right now. This year brought about the death of my granny. I swore I couldn't and wouldn't blog on her death, but I think it honestly is the only way I am going to bring some sense of closure to this year. So forgive me in advance this may be a bit long.
May 25 at 7am my phone rang..and I thought that was odd that the phone would be ringing that early unless someone had lost their everlasting mind, and it was my dad, but this time he hadn't gone completely crazy.. He told me: "Granny is gone."




How could this be? How could a woman that raised a basketball team of kids be gone so soon? I thought she was just in the hospital with pneumonia and she'd fight it and be cussing us all out within a few days. Where's the granny that made the bomb poundcake? Where's the granny that could get away with cussing my daddy up one side and the other and dare him to talk out the side of his neck? More importantly, why didn't I take my azz down to SC to see her before she died? It was like a replay of what had happened with my grandfather just 10 years before, he died in the hospital, yet again.. I didn't go when my gut instincts told me to. I missed out on telling both of them goodbye.

But anyway, I don't want this blog to be sad and sappy.. I wanted to finally share some of what happened at the fune. (yes..FUNE)..

Lawd help us all..I don't know why the preacher couldn't pronounce a doggone thing correctly ya'll but by the time she hit that 5th "Tab-a-nacka" (aka Tabernacle) I WAS DONE. Not to mention I have my evil little sister elbowing me in the by that 5th one.. I was crying but burst out laughing uncontrollably..lawd I hope granny understood I just couldn't hold that ish.. so I put my face in my purse..and my sister is rubbing my back hollaring LET IT OUT SWEETIE..JUST LET IT OUT!! did I mention I can't stand her sometimes?! LOL

Then I don't know who came up with the brilliant idea to let random folks speak about granny. My uncle spoke, a neighbor spoke, then some man gets up to speak.
Fam, hear me when I tell you ..NOBODY knew who this man was but he said such nice things.
1. He said my granny loved music and when he visited her in the nursing home, she just loved to hear him sing.

um. blink. blink. blink.

Granny was NEVER in a nursing home...but er uh..ok. blink.

2. He talked about their visits every time he saw her at the nursing home and the things they'd talk about. this point I'm looking around like is anyone else listening to this ish?

My uncle looks at me like WTF?

Then it hits me..this mofo think he at someone else's funeral.. possibly my OTHER grandmother.

oh's too late to stop this mofo..cuz he's on a roll. He's sniffling and talking about how nice of a person she was blah blah blah and blah.

So I lean over to my sister and ask if this mofo even bothered to look in the casket that's behind him cuz he ain't stopping for ish.

He finally wraps it up after he realizes the entire room is blank staring at him. I wanted so bad to raise my hand, but I think granny was looking out cuz I couldn't lift my arm for ish. She knew I was bout to say some ish.

Anyway, I could go on and on, but just writing this blog has made me cry and laugh at the same time. The one thing I can take away from 2010 is something my granny told me the last time I saw her alive, she told me not to work so much that I can't stop to enjoy life and spend time with family. When I think about it, work is what kept me from getting to see both her and my grandfather before they died..
but anyhoo.. She also told me that KING MOFO wasn't ish years ago and I wished to gawd I had listened to that advice LOL..but anyway, I'm comforted in knowing she's reunited with my grandfather and aunts and they are all watching over me and my family. I hope in 2011 we'll continue to make them proud. I also plan to take granny's advice and not work so much..after all, I got a husband to find in 2011 LOL (don't ya'll say ISH.)

Happy New Year fam!

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  1. Happy New Year, Shameika. Your blog is REAL. From fan and a friend, God Bless and Happy 2011!

  2. I know that must of been hard for you but thanks for sharing. You AND your sister are a trip.
    You betta claim that husband for 2011 girl...I'm right there with you. ;)

  3. Happy New Year! Love your blogs. And funes are sad yet comical. Lol. May God bless you in the new year!


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