Hey Mofos! It's movie review tiiiiiiiime!

This time I went to check out the film, The Housemaid, starring Sydney Sweeney as Millie, the sweetest little trauma magnet you ever did see, and Amanda Seyfried as Nina Winchester, a woman so perfectly put together she makes a Botoxed porcelain doll look insecure. And of course we have Brandon Sklenar as Andrew, the husband whose whole personality whispers, “Ma’am, something about me is too perfect but you’ll want to overlook it because I have lots of money and I'm fine."

Here's the synopsis:

The Housemaid is a wildly entertaining thriller starring Sydney Sweeney and Amanda Seyfried, based on the best-selling book. From director Paul Feig, the film plunges audiences into a twisted world where perfection is an illusion, and nothing is as it seems. Trying to escape her past, Millie (Sweeney) accepts a job as a live-in housemaid for the wealthy Nina (Seyfried) and Andrew Winchester (Brandon Sklenar). But what begins as a dream job quickly unravels into something far more dangerous — a sexy, seductive game of secrets, scandal, and power. Behind the Winchesters’ closed doors lies a world of shocking twists that will leave you guessing until the very end.

Let's be serious, any time a rich, gorgeous couple invites you to live in their home, you better assume you’re walking straight into a psychological minefield. Chile, all money ain't good money or good for your nerves.  Millie shows up with her hopeful heart and a baggage full of lies, thinking she’s starting over. But babbbbyyyyyy, the only thing starting is a whole marathon of manipulation, desire, and rich-people nonsense.

Sydney Sweeney gives Millie this perfect mix of softness and simmering rage. You spend half the movie wanting to hug her and the other half wanting to drag her out of that mansion by her ankles yelling, “GIRL, YOU ARE IN DANGER!" or "SWING ON THIS HEFFA!!" Because every hallway, every whisper, every glance in that house is hiding something. Shoot even that little girl, CeCe gives me the creeps like she knows something but can't tell what it is.

Now let’s get into the real tea of the mess, because once this movie starts peeling back layers like a red onion, it becomes clear that the Winchester mansion isn’t just full of secrets, instead it’s full of generational dysfunction.

The moment Andrew’s mother steps into the story, you realize exactly why this man behaves like trauma behind that "beautiful smile." You'll understand why I put that in quotes later. Lady Winchester walks around with this air of superiority that says she’s been emotionally terrorizing people since before social media and cancelling folks existed. She’s the type of mother who doesn’t discipline, instead she damages. Everything about her feels rehearsed, curated, cold. She’s not raising children; she’s manufacturing legacies, whether they like it or not. After all, it is a privilege, according to her and her son.

The way she hovers even from a distance over Nina and Andrew’s marriage? That tells you everything. That woman has weaponized “family expectations.” Andrew didn’t just grow up in a privileged household, he grew up in an environment where emotions were liabilities, affection was rationed, and image was everything. No wonder he’s… complicated, and that strong jawline isn’t helping distract from the vibes.

This is where the movie gets really interesting, because suddenly it’s not just a thriller about Millie being pulled into the Winchesters’ chaos. It becomes a study in how generational trauma trickles down like poison and it seeps out in the most dangerous way when it's quiet, elegant, and devastating. Andrew learned emotional avoidance and survival tactics at home, the kind of behavior that makes everything in that house feel tense even when nobody’s doing anything outright. Nina learned to survive it. Millie? She walked straight into a centuries-old family volcano and didn’t even know the ground was hot. She just knew Andrew was hot. Like.. really hot. Look at him and tell me what you think. 

Sydney Sweeney channels Millie’s desperation and confusion beautifully, but once you see how this family operates, you realize she’s not the only one fighting for her life. Everyone in that house is wounded, but Andrew’s mother is the original architect of the mess, and she built that house on emotional quicksand. She is the Cruella of this entire film.

By the end, when the final twist hits, you’re left staring at the screen like, “None of y’all need a housemaid. Y’all need a collective intervention and mandatory 3x a week counseling.”

And that brings me to my final conclusion: THERAPYYYYY. YOU GET A SESSION, YOU GET A SESSION! 

Every. Single. Character. Needs. It.

Millie needs it. Nina needs it. Andrew needs it. CeCe the child needs it. Hell throw the gardener in too with his cute ass. And the mother? She needs to start tomorrow, first thing in the morning.

The Housemaid delivers scandal, seduction, psychological warfare, and a whole genealogy of unresolved trauma wrapped in wealth, spiral staircases, and marble countertops. It’s gripping, it’s beautifully shot, and it’s a wild reminder that until somebody breaks the cycle, the cycle will happily break everyone in its path.

The film is in theaters on December 19th. Let me know if you like it.

~Meik