tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post3831441200681406172..comments2023-06-18T11:21:36.377-04:00Comments on The Mofo Chronicles: Marriage MaterialUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-44342266093024016782010-12-13T12:20:24.943-05:002010-12-13T12:20:24.943-05:00I hope the sistas get a hold of the message. Y'...I hope the sistas get a hold of the message. Y'all have to love yourself first, improve yourself first, before you try to do anything to of for any man. Same thing goes for men. We are broken people trying to find maintenance in others.Dekaynonhttp://www.twitter.com/dekaynonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-52907691722701089782010-11-24T09:47:03.947-05:002010-11-24T09:47:03.947-05:00Thank you chica for your well written article! You...Thank you chica for your well written article! Your aha moment and the one I had after reading a commitment phobic book are what I like to call a great epiphany. It's a great feeling isn't it? <br /><br />Now if I can just get over him (and you know who it is) I'll be on my way! LOLAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-39235595632736420942010-11-24T00:14:07.410-05:002010-11-24T00:14:07.410-05:00Steph..I heart what you said.. I love how you put ...Steph..I heart what you said.. I love how you put it and you're soooo right..self evaluation should be an ongoing process!<br /><br />Anonymous, Karla, and Larry..thank you so much for your comments..~Meikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10913394076660437504noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-89101663471281060532010-11-24T00:05:20.982-05:002010-11-24T00:05:20.982-05:00Meik,
I really liked what you had to say in this ...Meik,<br /><br />I really liked what you had to say in this one. I could really REALLY see my old self in what Mr. JeCaryous said about people idealizing being in a relationship without actually seeing the one they were in. I discovered that my big issue was meeting a man, thinking he was a great guy, but not really thinking about how we'd work in a relationship together. Now that I HAVE learned to think this way, I'm able to see that, even if a guy is great and he likes me too, I need to spend time to see how we'd work as a couple. Plus, that time spent helps me trust him and gives him the time to get to know me! <br /><br />As for self-evaluation, sure that's important for growth in general; one should always be bettering one's self (even after you get married). While you're trying to find a relationship, It's important not to be too hard on yourself or try to make yourself something you're not. It's like trying to squeeze my figure into a size 2 that's tailored for someone else. It ain't gonna work. I'm going to wait to find that marvelous dress meant for me. It will look SO MUCH better than the severe muffin top poking out every opening of a torn Gucci size 2. <br /><br />I heart a metaphor.<br />-StephStephanie E.http://spinstersteph.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-92069770923584149532010-11-23T12:12:53.236-05:002010-11-23T12:12:53.236-05:00Meika,
This was one of the best articles that you ...Meika,<br />This was one of the best articles that you have written and you hit the nail right on the head. Sometimes you have to stand back and take a moment to evaluate your true self in order to get an answer to your own questions and why things aren't happening for you and you just have to "LET GO AND LET GOD HAVE HIS WAY" and he will eventually direct you to that right person whom has always been right in front of you..Again, I commend you for a well written article and I hope one day that Mr Johnson will add you to his team of writers because you are a talented writer and you would be a great addition to his company!!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-32498524208205046042010-11-23T11:04:34.902-05:002010-11-23T11:04:34.902-05:00Great summation of your experience, Meik. And even...Great summation of your experience, Meik. And even greater is the fact that you had your Aha! moment and didn't miss it. We often do. My big question in the proverbial mirror would have been, "Would I marry me?" Then wait to answer it for 24 hours. Pay careful attention to your attitude, character, temper, physical appearance, hygiene, etc in the next 24 hrs. Make notes and then answer that question the next morning. I promise 95% of us would go Whitney and say, "He(( to the naw I wouldn't marry me." And that is NOT a bad thing. Its a turning point. Now take that same list and work on putting it all in the right column. That way you are killing two birds with one stone; becoming marriage material is a process of getting yourself together...loving you! Thanks for the mirror check, Meik!Karlahttp://bonafideblogtalk.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8086354678368887027.post-33962548554430794542010-11-23T08:25:50.433-05:002010-11-23T08:25:50.433-05:00I havent caught up on the heartbreaker.. but i hav...I havent caught up on the heartbreaker.. but i have been cheated on before. I like that you know the blame game and dont want to play it anymore..<br />commitment phobic? <br />Loving yourself is a good first step meik, but more importantly, you should try to recognize your defense mechanisms for what they are. Ways to push someone away - and tell yourself how smart your being, and that caution is the better part of valor and so forth and so on. If you dont ever realize how you push others away.. ?<br />But.. if you push and they just go..(into another womans arms..) i dont think you should blame yourself either. Sometimes the hardest thing to accept is there is no blame - it is what it is - a failed love.. a broken heart and promise. It doesnt ease the hurt - or lessen the disappointment much does it?<br />Its a many faceted problem - whether being the one cheated on - the cheater - the scars all of it leaves behind when you move on and let go.. because amen - We're not Jesus, and forgiving dont come easy to most of us. <br />So - thats my opinion for what its worth. I dont know anything - even taking a long hard look in the mirror and knowing when you are ready to "sincerely" try again @ love is something no one else but you can help you with - much less all the other headgames you play with yourself - wondering if it was your fault - how things couldve been different - emptying the silos' and scorching the earth - leaving no life left on the planet the cheater inhabits..lol. However you react - deal - move on/get over... ?<br />Time helps.. but at the same time.. it can hurt you more also. Just like a wound getting infected or a broken bone healing.. yeah.. it healed.. but if it wasnt set? if it healed broken - the best it could? ugh. if it only were a broken bone we're talkin about, snap - ow - reset- cast - couple weeks/month and your good. In the case of a badly healed (but i feel fine!) heart... <br />yeah. i dont know what to say on that.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10945742856474715835noreply@blogger.com